“Gimme a Bud,” I requested, belly up to the bar at the Rose N Bee Pub here in Winnipeg on Wednesday.

Stompin’ Tom Connors had just died. Andrew Neville & The Poor Choices were playing “Sudbury Saturday Night.” Watermelon Slim might have been playing the harp. The place was packed.

“They water this stuff down, you know?” Matt the Bartender told me with a smirk. For years, he’s known about my preference for the Bud, though sometimes I’ll stray for a Standard or an ill-conceived shot of Jim Beam. I smiled as he tore off the cap.

“That’s what they say,” I answered, waving away the change from my fiver. He handed me the beer, and I commenced to down it.

Indeed. We reported on the allegations made south of the border last week.

It’s worth noting, though, that Budweiser in Canada has been brewed by Labatt’s for over 30 years now, and face none of the allegations that plague Anheuser-Busch south of the border. Budweiser is still No. 1 in sales in Canada, even with the increasing cost of drinking it. Still, the alleged “scandal” down south is bad for the King of Beers, and could certainly hurt sales if proved true.

And so tomorrow I begin my investigation. I’ll be driving south across the 49th parallel at Pembina, North Dakota, and continuing due south until we hit Austin, Texas. I have a fat stack of greenbacks and unlimited credit at my disposal, and keen desire to get to the bottom of this matter. No bartender will go unquestioned, no gas station unsurveyed, no stumbling drunk in the street unapproached. God Bless America.

Be sure to check back often to read about Sheldon’s booze-fuelled adventures down south as part of “America the Beautiful,” a series that may end up killing him.